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451 I’m a non Muslim woman. My mother was a non practicing Christian and as such I have not had a religious upbringing. I met and fell in love with a Muslim boy who is practicing.

We now have a daughter who is two. I have found out that he is married with another child. Shortly after becoming pregnant he admitted that he had a wife and he has another daughter three months younger than ours with his wife.

Despite this I still love him and want to spend the rest of my life with him. The relationship feels wrong and I do not want to continue along this path. I want the best for my daughter and want her to have a religious upbringing that I never had in order that she avoid a situation such as mine, but I’m scared that the life which I am leading will not result in this.

I also fear the persecution that she will face. I am willing to covert to Islam in order to try and live properly and would want to marry the father of my child and live properly. What implications does this have if I know that neither his first wife nor his family would agree and so the marriage would have to be kept secret? Is this better then the immoral relationship we have now?

I also receive little religious guidance from him on how I can become a Muslim and on how my daughter should be brought up. How is it that a non Muslim becomes a Muslim and where can I go for advice. Thank You
Welcome to our facility and thank you for conveying your question to us; god willing we will try to answer all of your queries in a manner that you can understand.

The society that we live in have sadly become servant to our whims and desires where adultery and fornication are accepted as part and parcel of life, Islam is a religion based on love and gives women many rights and securities that lack our society in the west. Looking at your situation we would say that morally its better that you marry the father of your child and look at Islam seriously as this will have implications on you and your child’s future.

Firstly a non Muslim becomes Muslim by holding the believe that “There is non worthy of worship except Allah; Muhammad is Messenger of Allah” in Arabic “La illaha Illalahu; Muhamadur Rasoolullah”. To believe in this is to act upon it; then one has to verbally recite the Shahadah (Testament/ oath) “Ashahadu An Laa ilaaha illal lahu; wahda hu la shareekala hu; Wa ash hadu anna Muhammadan Abdu Hu Wa Rasoollu. Meaning; “I testify that (there is) no partner for him (ALLAH). And I testify that certainly Muhammad (is) his worshipper and His Messenger”.

Thereafter to abstain from all acts against this testament and to learn and understand the fundamental beliefs of Islam and implement them into ones life for example praying (please see our website for the beliefs Muslims hold).

Please do not be hesitant in contacting us. If you find it more convenient to talk to a female, then Inshallah (god willing) we can also provide for you a Muslim woman who can explain the basics of Islam to you in an understandable manner. We will do our level best to explain Islam to you.

May Allah (S.W.T) open our heart to the true path and make us amongst those that he is pleased with.
Category (Islam / Muslims)